Author Topic: The Girl Who Walks the Border  (Read 4761 times)

Aya Squawkermaru

  • "You furnish the pictures and I'll furnish the war." - William Hearst
  • Relevant quote is relevant.
The Girl Who Walks the Border
« on: September 10, 2011, 12:27:51 AM »
So, um, here's a thing that I've been putting off long enough. This is my first fanfiction in quite awhile, not counting my entry for the NWC, so please don't be too hard on it (not to say you should just overlook mistakes and bad plot and what-have-you, just please take all that with a grain of salt.). I'll try to make updates at least semi-regular, but with school and other crap going on, along with my mindset of "I write when I feel like it", don't expect weekly updates or anything like that.

Also, big thanks to Ruro for proofreading this. Anyway, without further procrastination, here's a thing.

Also inb4 any other Elly fanfiction on the site to my knowledge oh man

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Chapter 1

Shinigami are interesting creatures indeed. Many people believe that they cannot die simply because they are the personification of death itself; however, this is not the case. Shinigami are not simply created; they are forged from the souls of people who have died. However, it is a sin for the dead to enter the world of the living; as such, shinigami have the border of life and death removed from them.

Instead of being both alive and dead, however, shinigami are neither. If you were to remove the border that separates a person from the air, namely their skin, their insides would not be contained. Indeed, the mess that would result could not be considered a person, or the air that surrounds them. Without the border of life and death, shinigami are neither alive nor dead, which allows them to enter the worlds of both the living and dead with impunity.

While this does not mean that shinigami are incapable of feeling pain, they still have the resilience of any normal Youkai. Elly was reminded of this as a bullet entered her left arm.

Although most people accepted their death, or were simply too scared to fight back, there was the occasional person who thought that they could defeat Death. One such person stood before Elly, shaking as he clutched his musket.

?I suppose I should commend you for your bravery, but I must condemn you for trying to cheat death. Honestly, if you didn't want to die so soon, you shouldn't have been smoking all that tobacco, you know?? Elly sighed, ?Really, I can't believe you people still smoke that stuff. Anything that gives you such a bad cough can't be good for your health.?

Mori Shizua shivered as he faced his opponent. He wasn't expecting Death herself to be to so nonchalant, especially after sustaining a musket wound to the arm. He fired off the musket again in fear, and anger. He shot multiple times, and though his aim was true, the shinigami simply stood there, watching him with condescension.

Finally, Elly grew bored of watching him shoot. She drew her scythe and charged at the man, before weaving around and crossing around him in one fluid movement. The blade of her scythe was now touching the front of his chest. ?Too bad,? was the last thing he heard as the scythe phased through his body and cut his life.
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Elly sighed as she sat on a cushion. Now that her job was done for the day, she had returned home for some well-needed rest. Harvesting was an interesting job, but it was also physically taxing. After a bit of sitting around and doing nothing, she heard a knock at the door. Elly rose up from her chair and opened the door. ?Onozuka. Please, do come in. Would you like something to drink? Tea, maybe??

Komachi nodded as she stepped through the door. ?Yeah, tea sounds good.?

As Elly went into the kitchen, Komachi walked over to the table and sat down on one of the cushions. She looked around and took in her surroundings. The room was mostly barren; with the exception of a small table in the center of the room and a few cushions, the main floor was entirely devoid of any furnishings. The rest of the house was characterized by the same lack of furniture; the kitchen contained only enough tools to prepare simple meals, the bedroom had only a closet containing a futon and some clothes.

?Hmm... I guess your place ain?t much different than mine, huh?? Komachi normally had a very imposing figure, aided by her scythe. However, she seemed to have put it away for the moment, and seemed less imposing in such a casual space.

?Oh, yes, I suppose this is your first time in my house. I guess I just don't really feel the need to personalize the place, since I spend most of my time away from home,? Elly answered from the kitchen.

?Yeah, but ya could still stand ta put some stuff in here, ya know? The place's so... mundane,? Komachi said, with a hint of disdain.

?I'm sorry my house isn't interesting enough for you,? Elly said, a bit sarcastically. She soon returned with the tea. ?So, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?? she asked, as she set the tea down on the table, before sitting down opposite Komachi.

Komachi grinned as she took a sip of the tea. ?Well, it's Friday night, which means a night on the town. I figured I should remind ya ta bring yer wallet this week. After all, we don't want a repeat of last week...?

Elly winced at the memory. She would never look at a shoe the same way again. ?Er, yeah. Thanks for that, I guess.?

Komachi slapped her friend's back, seemingly not noticing the yelp of pain that ensued. ?Of course! But, ta make up for that, first round's on you tonight.?

Elly sighed a resigned sigh. ?Fine, but remember that a round is just one drink per person. No drinking competitions this time, okay??

Komachi grinned, and brought her face close to Elly's, gaining a startled look from her friend. ?Oh? Are ya sure ya aren't just jealous??

?W-what? Jealous of what?? Elly stared at her friend in confusion, leaning back to get some space.

?Why, of my drinking ability, of course!? Komachi beamed with pride at this, returning to her earlier position. ?I've been Higan's champion for three years in a row! Of course ya'd be jealous of such talent! Don't worry, though; I'd be more than happy ta take ya on as my appre- Oof!?

Elly brought her hand down from Komachi's head. ?Really, Onozuka, don't be so arrogant. Just because we're shinigami doesn't mean we can go around sinning as much as we want like that. Besides, you can have your title revoked at any time by the Enma.?

Komachi rubbed her head where Elly had hit her. ?And hittin' me is any better? Yer such a hypocrite, Elly.?

?It's for your own good. Just be thankful that wasn't the Enma's Rod of Remorse,? she said, recounting her own experiences with the Rod. Most new shinigami developed calluses on their heads from being whacked so often; Elly had been no exception.

Komachi nodded solemnly, remembering her own sessions with the Rod. ?I know it's fer our own good and all, but she really shouldn't be so strict...?

?Well, it's not our place to judge the Enma's actions,? Elly said, shrugging. ?But, I'll agree she does go a bit overboard sometimes...?

Komachi finished her tea, placing it on the table with a contented sigh. ?Anyway, we should get goin' soon. It's almost happy hour.?
___________________________________________________________________________________

An empty mug slammed on the table. ?Ah, that's the stuff! Hey, hey, barkeep! Another... another round fer me an' my buddy 'ere!?

Elly rubbed her temples, vexed by her friend's behavior. ?I said not to go overboard, Onozuka. You'll black out if you keep this up.? She glanced around the room, and saw numerous stares in their direction. ?Besides, it's embarrassing...?

Komachi sent Elly a wide grin. ?Aw, lighten up! We've both had long days, an' nothin' beats kickin' back like this after a long day a' work. So just relax, have some fun! Life is short, enjoy it while it lasts.?

?...You do realize that last bit doesn't apply to us?? Elly retorted. She felt something poking her back, but ignored it for now. ?Besides, you know the Enma disapproves of drinking so much-?

?An' she'll fire me an' I'll die, an' so on,? Komachi finished for her in a mocking tone. ?Ya always say that, but nothin's happened yet. Yer just bein' paranoid.?

Elly shook her head, disappointed. ?Don't just wave it off like that...? she noticed that her back was being prodded again, but continued to dismiss it. ?I shouldn't have to chastise you so much. You should know better.?

?Think of it this way: we're shinigami, so we don't have ta worry 'bout the long-term. If the Enma revokes our title, we die, an' we're pretty much guaranteed resurrection because of our services to Higan. Otherwise, we either continue as shinigami, or move on to become Enma ourselves. No matter what, we win. So, I want to enjoy my time as shinigami as much as I can, make this existence as enjoyable as possible, y'know?? Komachi reasoned, nodding her head in a sagely manner.

Elly rolled her eyes at her friend's reasoning. ?There've been shinigami sent to hell before, you know.?

?You really do take this all too seriously, ya know,? Komachi said, waving her finger in a drunken attempt to imitate the Enma during one of her lectures. ?If you keep being so up-tight about yer job, it's gonna get ya in trouble some day.?

?You really have no right to talk, you know. Besides, how would I get in trouble for taking my job seriously?? Finally, she couldn't ignore the poking, and turned around. ?What do you want??

Floating before her was a faery from Higan, a messenger by the looks of it. It looked down, fidgeting nervously. ?Um, the Enma wishes to speak with you...?

Elly grabbed Komachi's shoulder, and turned her so that she was facing the faery. ?See? What did I tell you? This wouldn't have happened if you'd just listened.?

The faery shook her head, then looked Elly straight in the eyes. ?No, the Enma isn't asking for Miss Komachi. She wishes to speak with you, Miss Elly.? The shinigami couldn't help but gulp.

Alfred F. Jones

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Re: The Girl Who Walks the Border
« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2011, 11:29:26 AM »
Something I didn't make note of in my proofreading: Why the alternate spelling of "faery"? Just a stylistic choice?

Anyway, this is a good start, that it is. :3c

Re: The Girl Who Walks the Border
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2011, 12:00:27 PM »
Now I'm hooked for what will happen next. This is short but sweet; great job!

(Why can't I say anything but that)

Crow's Dumping Ground of Art

"So I never have to worry what tomorrow will bring, because my faith is on solid rock; I am counting on God."

Aya Squawkermaru

  • "You furnish the pictures and I'll furnish the war." - William Hearst
  • Relevant quote is relevant.
Re: The Girl Who Walks the Border
« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2011, 01:38:48 AM »
Something I didn't make note of in my proofreading: Why the alternate spelling of "faery"? Just a stylistic choice?

Anyway, this is a good start, that it is. :3c

Yeah, Esifex's spelling of faery rubbed off on me. That, and this makes it so that using the word fae isn't as weird.

Thanks!

Now I'm hooked for what will happen next. This is short but sweet; great job!

(Why can't I say anything but that)

Thank you as well! I noticed that it isn't typical chapter length, but my writing has always been shorter than most. Last year in English, I got away with an essay half the required length, because my teacher agreed there was nothing else to be said. I'm just a concise writer, I suppose.